Pages

Wednesday, May 10, 2023

The Ten Commandments, MAGA Version

The Texas Legislature wants to post the Ten Commandments in every classroom in the state.  While that would be a violation of the establishment clause, and the conscience of anyone who sees those commandments as religiously based, it would be completely inconsistent with far right wing extremist Republican Trumpism to put up ten commandments which Trump himself ignores and violates every time he takes a breath and opens his mouth.  

So maybe these would work better. 

1. Thou shalt have no other gods before Donald Trump.  Or after Donald Trump. 

2. Thou shalt make a graven image unto him. 


3. Thou shalt believe conspiracy theories spoken in the name of Donald Trump.

4. Remember the Rally date, to keep it holy. 

5. Honor your father and your mother, if they gave you an inheritance and set you up to cheat in business. 

6. Thou shalt not kill unless they are liberals, foreigners, Democrats, Latinos, Asians or African Americans and thou art using an assault rifle.

7. Thou shalt commit adultery to humiliate thy wives, with porn stars, and anyone who thinketh thou art a celebrity, or in a dressing room of a high end retail store and she says "No!"  

8. Thou shalt not steal unless it adds to the value of your company.  This includes not paying thy contractor invoices.

9. Thou shalt not bear false witness unless it is to thy advantage, embellishes thy resume, enhances thy stock portfolio or convinces idiots to vote for thyself.  

Oh, what the hell.  

9. Thou shalt not tell the truth, ever. 

10. Thou shalt not covet unless what thou are coveting has significant monetary value or brings significant political advantage, or it isn't yours.   

No comments:

Post a Comment